Dear Diary-Uh,
Many weeks have gone by since we first met
Little did I know our relationship would be so wet
You are my constant companion, always by my side
You’ve taken my intestines for quite a ride
I’m out of breath whenever you call,
For you’ve given me the runs to the nearest bathroom stall
Whatever I eat, you always have something to say,
For if I save money eating street food, it is my stomach that
has to pay
Always dressed in unusual colors and consistencies with a
new change of pace,
You have impressed me much in your versatility, if that is
the case
During my sleepless nights you’ve called every hour to show
your resilient might
Groaning, moaning, my intestines writhing in…delight
Though we connected on the inside, my experiences have
always been out-of-body
We joke and play, though people cringe when they see we are
so bawdy
Till we meet again, for now I must depart…
Have you come so soon? Or do you tease me with a fart?
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